Let’s be real. No one wants to be the only sober one in the crew. But what would you rather be, sober or dead?

It’s a new year.. resolutions making and ting.. how ‘bout making the resolution to practice safe driving habits this year?

ARRIVE ALIVE!!! In Trinidad and Tobago, we’re all too familiar with this phrase. Did you know we rank 15th on the world record for the worst traffic collisions and loss of life. Scary shit right? We average approx. 200 fatalities per annum, 83% are male, 38% are pedestrians, most of our fatalities are between ages of 17 and 35 years and the majority of deaths occur on Saturday nights. Some of us already knew this, yet these stats are not decreasing. Is it that Trinis adopted the lackadaisical way of thinking and behaviour towards our roads and road safety?

We see this happen every day, it happened to many of us, from small collisions to major accidents. In the past few weeks, we’ve seen at least 7 major accidents that took lives. Are we in the twilight zone? Naaaa man we better than that. We’re supposed to be the small island of love, party and beauty. It’s sucky enough we’re heading up the ladder with the no. of murders. Organize allyuh selves nah T&T.

Some people argue and complain about the Law Enforcement. Law enforcement requires (a) strong laws/legislation (b) adequate infrastructure to effectively and efficiently enforce laws (c) swift justice; but we as individuals can make such a huge change by simply being cautious and more careful.

Yuh wanna ARRIVE ALIVE? Here are some reminders:

(1) Designate a DRIVER! Let’s be real. No one wants to be the only sober one in the crew. But what would you rather be, sober or dead? MAN UP. If yuh know you’re the designated driver for the night, doh put the lives of everybody else in danger. Take turns so that everyone gets their chance to have fun, and still be safe.

(2) Don’t drive like a taxi man- EVEN if you’re a taxi. People be out here like they playing Need for Speed or shooting a scene of Fast and Furious… take it down a notch. I have seen some of these drives in action, allyuh heart can’t be good after all the whooshing past people.

(3) Don’t AIM to be fashionably late. Chances are, (if you’re anything like me) you’ll be late ANYWAY. Yea, yuh wanna look fresh and turn heads etc.. but nobody wanna actually miss the surprise. Leave your house at an hour where you think you could reach to your event WITHOUT having to kick down on the highway.

(4) Know yuh vehicle – Come on. Yuh fully aware that your tyres not in the best condition, Yuh lights kinda dim, and yuh windshield wipers doh really wipe, well they moving up n down but yuh still cah see one shit on d road… especially in de night. ARE YOU STILL DRIVING FAST? … But why though?

Tough thing is, we are all guilty of at least one of these things above… but let’s just remember to take it slow on the road nah guys, it’s always fun and games until it gets serious. WE preach it. Arrive Alive. Arrive Alive. Arrive. Alive… do we practice what we preach though?

Now obviously this will not hold true for all women but those who can identify are going to read this and chuckle to themselves.

I don’t care how much money you make
Oh she cares. She very well cares. Women need stability and financial security. We need to know that you can provide for us. As with everything there are exceptions to this rule. But for the most part we do, maybe at varying degrees, but we all do!
 
Weight
I weigh X or Y amount. This is such a personal issue. Women are sometimes embarrassed by their true size, may it be lesser or larger. According to surveys, women have lower self-esteem than men, I blame society. Lying about our weight gives us an instant confidence boost.
 
I got it on sale
No she didn’t, moving on.
 
I had X amount of sexual partners
She may climb the scale to not seem inexperienced. She may jet down the scale to not seem like a ‘hoe’.
 
Size does not matter
Unless you’re packing a mandingo, John Holmes type penis, size does matter. What make ‘niccas’ think they can hit her spot with a 1 inch pinky finger type d*ck. Let’s be real. We’re considerate to your feelings so we won’t tell you, but c’mon guys that’s a no-brainer. See here

I’m forever faithful.
I’ve never cheated and I would never cheat. She has and she will. She doesn’t want you thinking any lesser of her so she will try to keep past indiscretions to herself. This is a another topic on it’s own though, so we will stop here for now.
 
I don’t suck D*CK…Sorry!
I don’t perform oral on the male sexual, reproductive, intromittent organ that additionally serves as the urinal duct. O_o
 
I’m fine.
Disaster Alert! For the love of ‘Gawwd’ she’s not fine.
 
I want to meet your mom.
This woman brought you into this world. She thinks she’s queen. She’s going to be the reason for most arguments. We’ll never be good enough, smart enough, we’re too fat, too small, too tall, too short, smell too good. If we could hold out from meeting your mom until wedding day, we most definitely will. Even then we’ll find a way to scratch her name off the guest list.
 
I have never lied to you.
This is still the most believable lie.

 
Sorry Ladies! Agree or Disagree? Share your views